REAL LIFE HEIST
A truth that's told with bad intent beats all the lies you can invent.― William Blake, Auguries of Innocence
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I GOT SENTENCED to five years confinement in the United States Bureau Prisons to be followed by five years of Supervised Probation for violation of 18 USC 3536 Bank Fraud. I plead to two counts, and four counts were dismissed as part of a plea agreement, but the cantankerous old judge ordered restitution on all six counts. When I walked out of the courtroom, I told the dumpster attorney that,
“He can't-do that, order restitution to counts dismissed.”
I don’t know how I knew that, but I did.
“I know,”
the hapless lawyer said,
“But if I go tell him that he's liable to give you the Max on both counts.”
He was probably right.
Took me two hours to find Hughey v. United States, 495 U. S. 411 (1990), just Shepadizeing the Statute. Dude was caught with 84 different credit cards and five separate identification, and they did the same thing to him; ordered restitution to counts dismissed. "Held: A restitution award is authorized only for the loss caused by the specific conduct that is the basis of the offense of conviction. @Pp. 495 U. S. 415-422. That means you only pay restitution to the counts you were convicted of, not counts dismissed in the Plea Agreement, just like I told him.
A PHOTOCOPY OF the United States Supreme Court’s decision attached thereto, my simple three-page pro-se (without counsel) Motion to Correct an Illegal Sentence or Rule 35 Motion it’s called, I fucked them out of a couple million dollars with the swipe of the pen. The US Attorney’s Office previously conceded and joined the motion but started backpedaling at Sentencing when they realized the Two Counts I was convicted of amounted to less than $2,800, and I had just snookered them out of over two million dollars, AGAIN! The judge asked me if I had anything to say before he granted my Pro-se Motion as previously unopposed. I told them when I swiped all that money I didn’t plan on paying it back. I seen him scribble something furiously on his desk and look down at me over his reading glasses with a look on his face like he wanted to personally administer the Lethal Drug Cocktail to me under the newly enacted Federal Death Penalty Act, and I thought I saw his face turn Beet Red and a puff of smoke coming out of his ears...
I WAS THE HEAD LAW CLERK at FCI SEAGOVILLE, TEXAS, when I won this motion and I accidentally on purpose, left a dozen copies of the Order Granting my Pro-se Motion in the copy machine, and even though I didn't have any codefendant's, my two million dollars Real Life Heist was upwards of Twenty Million by the end of the week, after David had taken on Goliath and single-handedly wrangled a cash settlement and a reduced sentence. And there were exactly a dozen eyewitnesses. It was then that the line of Men waiting to see me starting to get long.
Copyright 2014 by Mark Anthony Given
All Rights Reserved 28 USC 1746, Invoking 90 Stat. 2541 and
of Literary and Artistic Works
2:34 PM 3/8/2015
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